Monday, July 12, 2010

Oh my, Monday already?

- I used to fear when we had the Lord's Supper at church that I would drop the tray of juice. After all, the idea of that grapey symbolism on the carpet or my neighbor sounds sticky. "Oops, dropped Jesus' blood on your pretty dress. Sorry about that." But really, I think it's easier to drop the plate of "crackers" everywhere, and once they've scattered it's all over.

Speaking of church, does Jesus give bonus points for getting to church in a hurry? Based on the people tailgating me or flying past me over the double-yellow lines, they obviously think so.

- Attention editors of "Police Women of Memphis:" When you shoot the show during the summer, and all of the shots of the cops are full of green trees and grass, don't come back and shoot your establishing shots of the city in the winter when everything's brown. I mean, hey, you're already showing us full of druggie pistol-packing thugs, at least make the scenery look good, am I right?

- Red Sox report at the All-Star break: 51-37, tied for fourth most wins in the majors, and yet in third place in the AL East, two games back of Tampa for the wild card and five back of the Dang Yanks. I can't complain too much. Well, I could, but let's not revisit the cruel month of April when Boston apparently forgot that Spring Training was over. The Sox are managing to stay close despite Sunday's lineup including names such as McDonald, Patterson, Nava and Cash, none of whom were heard of two months ago unless you were ordering something at Burger King, while the likes of Pedroia, Martinez, Ellsbury, Beckett and Buchholz have been on the DL.

- This week on SO YOU THINK YOU CAN DANCE, bless you, Cat, for calling out the judges for blatant favoritism. For weeks they've said that Jose is only slightly better technically than a backup dancer on "Glee," yet they love him anyway so it doesn't matter. Except when Adecheke is actually good at the dancing thing, but they don't think he smiles enough so they rip him and his ancestry and clothes and nitpick beyond control. So what's the show? So You Think You Can Kind Of Dance But Who Cares If You're Likable?

- Elsewhere, on THE NEXT FOOD NETWORK STAR we adore Aarti, and of the top ten there were maybe three with a chance, including Aria and Herb, although he seems to be talking himself out of it lately. What I don't get is why Brianna is still there? In challenges involving outsiders, the "normal folks" don't like her. Why would they give her a show with an audience that finds her snooty?

- The contestants on TOP CHEF are a cross between the smoking, cussing, mean-spirited but terrible at cooking "Hell's Kitchen" and actual cooking ability of "The Food Network Star," with the fancy jargon of "Chopped." Does everything have to be reduced, made into a puree or sprayed into confetti? (Oh, "confit?" Whatever. You don't know what it means, either.)

- You know, AMERICA'S GOT TALENT judges, if you don't care (and judging by your inclusion of the old screechy redhead lady in the top 48, you don't), then why should I give a rat's patoot?


erin said...

I was so glad to see Paul go home on Food Network Star. He tried WAY too hard. We like Aarti and Tom and Serena (even though Serena has little chance of winning probably). I think Tom has really grown, and it would be nice to see someone who just seems like an average guy get his own show.

Jeff said...

We like Serena a lot, too, and when Paul condescended to her a few weeks back, he was officially dead to us. What a jerk.

Jeff said...

Oh, and Tom's definitely got the Judd Apatow-comedy kind of vibe, so maybe he could start a Slacker Cooking show, lol.