If you know me and Val at all and our TV and pop culture addictions, then of COURSE you predicted correctly that last night we would watch the Jake-Vienna smackdown during the last half-hour of Monday's "Bachelorette." How could we resist the implosion of our least favorite reality show couple of all time?
All in all, we still feel both are shallow famewhores who should never be heard from again. And yet, during the interview/battle royale, we couldn't help but side with Vienna a teensy little bit. Why? Because Jake was that much of a D-bag. Really, he was almost monumental in A-holery.
Everything she provided as an example of his bad attitude, he did during the interview, include blowing his stack and telling her to "respect" him by shutting up. Yeah, she interrupted him a lot, but dude, she's a gal, you're a guy, that's reality.
What were Jake's big examples of being "undermined" in a relationship going downhill fast? She double-checked his sense of direction and his measurements for bedroom furniture. That's not "undermining," it's called a "relationship." Every stereotype than every comedian has employed about marriage, these two act as if they've discovered as if they're living in a cave a million years ago. Clearly these two have never been a couple. Heck, even the Neanderthal men knew to shrug it off when their women nagged that the mastodon meat didn't taste as good as it used to.
I was even disappointed in our boy, Chris "this is the final rose" Harrison, hosting the fracas. Based on his questioning of Vienna and the way he chummed with Jake at the end once she had cried and left, Harrison sounded like he was buddy-buddy with Jake: "Sheesh, women, huh? I mean, all the talking and crying and, come on, when was the last time she ironed your shirt?" Of course, he's probably mandated by ABC to side with The Bachelor first, lest the network admit that it hired a major D-bag to be their knight in smirking armor.
Now they can both shuffle away forever, please, and never be heard from again.