Randy thinks the guys are playing behind already, Paula hopes not since she hasn't given all of them her address and phone number yet, and Simon just wants to get on with already. I'm with him, so let's go, and welcome legend Diana Ross as our so-desperate-for-attention-she'll-pretend-to-like-crappy-young-singers coach:
Brandon - The good news: It's not so bad that he was shaky to begin the night, since there were 11 others behind him and viewers forgot he wasn't great. Bad news: He was first of eleven, and viewers likely forgot who he was by 9:55.
Melinda - Typical week, Ryan and Simon trade "You're gay. No, you're a flamer" insults, and Paula's back off her meds. The past two weeks she's been so mellow. This week, she's all teary and weepy because of a decent performance. We missed you, Paula! Simon calls her a young Gladys Knight (Melinda, not Paula), and yeah, I can see that. Powerful, awesome voice, but GIANT head. It's got it's own weather system.
Chris S. - Yeah, that was a disaster, and the judges called him on it. It sounded as if someone was pulling out his curls as he sang. Simon's also right in saying to keep the glasses. He does not look good without them, at least with that hair. Not a good night for Chris. If he survives this night due to the goodwill of the country and Sanjaya's expected suckiness, here's hoping he finds himself and makes it to the final three like I've been hoping.
Gina - Could someone tell Diana Ross that "pronounciate" isn't a word? And then it didn't matter, since I couldn't understand half of what she said. And then Paula actually used "enunciate" properly, which in no way makes her smarter than Diana Ross, you hear me? As for Gina, I'm still not a fan. Seems too arrogant, full of her fake attitude.
Sanjaya - Aw, he curled his hair. He's just so pretty! I want to take him to Carraba's and eat dinner together with candlelight, we'll hula together at night, and he'll probably be available soon if this week's performance matters. Poor kid, I think he was ready to go home three weeks ago, and America won't let him. If he makes it to next week he might just come out with Monty Python's "I'm A Lumberjack" and make fun of the whole darn process. Of course, if he did that, I would totally vote for him.
What's her name again? Oh yeah, Haley - She does that thing with lifting her fingers off the microphone that bugged me with Carrie Underwood. I guess it's a timing device and taught, but it bugs me. Looks like Haley is trying to be this year's McPheever, but she doesn't have the chops for it. At least, not consistently. But as bad as it sounds, she's the last "white girl next door" candidate, and that might get her into the top ten. Unlike Katharine, Haley can't count on my support since there are no more Future Mrs. Rushings, only one Current Mrs. Rushing.
Apparently Haley forgot the words during her song. At the end of the judging, Paula says not to care if she does and to keep going. Well, that's great and all, but you guys point it out as soon as she's finished, so it's not like the audience won't figure it out, right?
Phil - Superficially (really, isn't this whole blog about that), his huge bald head is freaking me out. It's too coneheady. Stick to wearing hats, dude. His singing: Good, his best since auditioning. Still not as good as half the women and a few of the guys, though.
LaKisha - She sings "God Blessed the Child," and she's certainly blessed with pipes good enough to win, and she's so bubbly and likable. Simon says she and Melinda are in their own league, and right now I can't disagree.
Blake - Okay, I'll set you free. You remind me too much of that Boogie guy from Big Brother, and that's not good. Usually it takes a few weeks of the top 12 for the judges to make a 180 on their audition/Hollywood/top 24 recommendations and praises by telling someone to stop doing something that makes the contestant original. In Blake's case, it happened this week. I'd like to hear him sing a song normally, too, but you can't tell someone that they have an original style and then force them to leave their comfort zone when it makes you bored.
Stephanie Edwards - I need her to be gone if only because her name is a mix of my sisters' and it's confusing me. So much so that when they came to visit over a week ago, I told the security gate to expect Stephanie "Edwards" instead of "Lucas" because this Idol contestant has infected my brain. Yeah, I'm selfish. The judges hit her hard for reasons only known to them, while the audience heard strong vocals and a fine song, so shut up, judges.
Chris R. - Really wants to be Justin Timberlake, but ain't no way he's bringing the sexy back. Far too much of the song he was yelling and wailing, and in no way was it what you or I might deem "singing."
Jordin - My favorite, but a little nervous tonight. The judges didn't see it like I did, however, and pronounced her an equal with Lakisha and Melinda. There's still hope, then. Keep her dream alive, America! I don't vote, I just judge yours.
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I thought the exact same thing about Diana Ross saying "pronounciate." I laughed when she kept saying it.
Melinda! Melinda! Melinda!
I was watching it with my family, and when Diana Ross created her own word, I practically shouted, "There's enunciate and pronounce, but there's no pronunciate!" I get a little excited about vocabulary.
I have a feeling Sanjaya isn't going anywhere for a while, and that has me very very depressed.
Later last night I read Television Without Pity's recap and they, too, noticed, so apparently Diana Ross is the only person on the planet who can't tell the difference.
But that's okay, because she's Diana Ross.
We're still working our way through the episdoe we DVR'd but so far we are of the exact thoughts, perhaps with the exception of Haley, who sounded pretty good, at least better than anything in the past. We have the last four to watch, but dang man. Brandon sounds too much like DL Hughley, especially if you watyched Studio 60. Melinda, well she and Lakisha have the advantage already, and then you go and have the contestents sing Diana Ross?!?!? Why not just eliminate all the guys and any white ladies now. Sheesh! Yeah, and there is something odd about Melinda's head.
We like Chris, glasses or not, I give him credit for the arrangement, but if he sang it straight he would have been slammed for not making it original or his own, so he makes it his own (or at least Coldplay's) and still gets slammed.
Gina - I want to like her, but the ending with weak, boring chorus stuff with the back-up singes was the pits. Did you notice her mom has red in the hair now too?
Michael Jackson, Jr. - I have never wished more that they had a judges VETO button they could deploy twice a season. Sanjaya would be gone and Sundance would be here still. I knew that Sanj had no idea at all what Simon was talking about and was trying to figure out where there was a SeaWorld in Beverly Hills. What a moron, and a no-talent moron at that.
Haley - Okay, I liked the voice, nice look, weird thing with the belt around her groin apparently there to keep her dress attached to her body, not that it helped with her sitting on the chair for all the upskirt pervs to enjoy.
Phil Stacey - too much like Peter Furler of the Newsboys with his ears sticking out further. Good vocals, and thankfully less eye make-up than past weeks. Wanna just give him the shaggy hair and call him Cryptkeeper?
Kiki - whatever, black gospel voice doing a jazz standard. Amy said fat people should not wear white.
We'll watch the rest of the show later.
Val wasn't a fan of the dress, either, but I thought she looked very nice. Women are harsh!
You calling me a woman? Woman! You're a woman, because that's what I think of you! (obscure reference to Adventures of Ford Fairlane here)
haha when paula cried for Melinda Joe & I both said her valium wore off. poor paula.
I wish you and Joe would quit teasing Melinda about her huge noggin! She's awesome!
OMG we were laughing at pronunciate too.
Sanjaya - i agree he wants to leave. Poor kid has been through enough & he knows he shouldn't be there!
Haley - i just keep thinking she'd make a good Christian pop singer. I don't know why! Amy Grant resemblance? I see her on stage with Carmen.
Jordin - she has now sung 2 cheesy songs from Disney movies! Enough!!! She's just too corny.
With the "look-up-my-skirt" dress she Haley wore this week, I doubt she's going for the Christian audience.
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